TS Dates! One of the great things about being the internationally famous Porn Dude is that bitches always want my cock. I find it when I’m out and about, and I also find it online, and I always want it with no strings attached. Speaking of strings attached, the broads on this dating site come with that extra bonus bit dangling between the legs. Yes, ladies and gentlemen and shemales of legal ages, TSdates.com is exactly what it sounds like.

The header on TS Dates calls it a Premium Adult Transsexual Dating site, which is what you were hoping for, right? On any dating site, you want plenty of people signed up and connected at any point. You’ll never get a tranny to shake her dick in your face if you’re looking for one in a virtual ghost town. TSdates claims to have nearly 100 million members, which is “More single, local transsexual hotties than any other sites!”

Tons of Trannies in Your Area

The landing page shows off some of the hotter ladyboys on the site. Honestly, if I was illiterate, I would think these bitches have nice, tight pussies where they actually have big, throbbing dingdongs. The chicks with dicks sliding across the top part of the screen look like models, and probably are. A handful of profile photographs from actual users are pasted just below that, though.

Apparently, there are 90,000 users connected to the site right now. That’s a pretty fucking hopping tranny dating site, but you don’t even get to poke around until you sign up. I’m really curious to get in and look around, because TSdates claims there are 1.5 million users in my state alone. That’s way fucking more than I would’ve expected, and I kind of wonder how true it really is.

Registration is quick and easy. They ask you if you’re a dude, a broad, or a tranny, and who you’re looking for. You can enter your sexual orientation, body type and a few other pieces of personal information, but it’s not mandatory. Pick a public username and write up a little blurb about yourself. They’ll send you an instant registration email, you’ll click the link, and then you’re in.

Surprise! They’d Like Some of Your Money

Son of the bitch. As soon as I clicked the email link to confirm my account, TSdates dropped me off on a payment page with a few membership options. A standard month of Gold Membership will run you 40 bucks, but by default they try to sell you a full year. It breaks down to about half the rate, but that’s still a $240 charge on your credit card that you may have to explain to the wife.

Gold Members get instant access to millions of full profiles, sexy videos and photos of people who want to hook up now. That’s from their memberships spiel, word for word. If I was really trying to suck a shemale dick tonight, I’d be a little bit fucking annoyed. Then again, I’ve paid way more than that just to watch a girl shoot ping-pong balls out of her snatch. Getting laid usually costs a few bucks, anyway.

TSdates ain’t done with your wallet yet, though. You can also Enhance Your Plan with Standard Contacts. This normally costs $21 a month, but again, they try to hook you for a full year at a little over a Benjamin. Holy fuck. Just rolling with the default, pre-chosen options will run you around $350. I hope this shit works!

That standard contacts enhancement is for moneyed perverts who still want to fuck the broke-ass perverts. Gold members have unlimited access to all members, but free members can’t contact gold members or see their full profile unless that member has upgraded their account. Confused? Don’t blame me; it’s probably intentional. People spend more money when they think they have to.

Or Fuck Around with Trannies for Free

The payment page makes it look like you need to come out of pocket if you want to play on TSdates. It seems like the only way out is the Continue button underneath all the payment options. If you’re cheapskate, or if you’re not really sure yet if you really want some strange with a side of enormous cock, you can just click the Home icon.

The main screen of TSdates looks like a cross between a porn site and Facebook. The sidebar is all about your Friends, Flirts and Messages. Since I’m brand-new and don’t know anybody, I just see a bunch of zeros listed next to everything. If I had friends, their new posts would be featured in my Member Activity feed. They’ve helpfully filled this in with some stuff I might be interested in, but I guess I’d be even more interested if I really wanted a lady’s dick up my ass tonight.

At the top of the screen is a selection of online members. Since I haven’t paid for an account, these are obviously people who sprung for the enhancement. Some are really dudely, masculine men in drag, while others are totally passable. One is sucking a big dick, a tease of all the amateur porn I’m locked out of as a free user. Names, ages and sex are listed, but if I hover over I get a box with even more information.

I put my mouse over a preop tranny on hormone therapy looking for safe play. That’s her own self-description, as is her request to be used by huge hung guys until she’s begging for mercy. She’s a little less than 50 miles away from me, so a hook up tonight is absolutely conceivable. Checking out some of these other online users, it’s clear that TSdates has chosen to show me trannies relatively close to me. That’s exactly the kind feature you want in a dating or hookup site.

Meet the Shemale Slut of Your Dreams

Even though I’m able to communicate with enhanced users and look at thumbnails of their photos, TSdates is very clear that I’m missing out unless I offer up some cash. Upgrade buttons are everywhere, even on these little hover-over boxes. There are constant reminders that if I give them my credit card number, I can see photos and jerk off to videos, connect via messages and become friends.

If I view a user’s profile, their main photo is intentionally tiny, mocking you with Upgrade buttons all around it. Trying to click the Photo Album tab brings you directly to the sign-up page, because fuck you, you bum ass freeloader. There’s amateur shemale porn in there, and you don’t get to look if you’re broke.

Since I’m viewing enhanced profiles, I can click the flirt button or send a message. Clicking Add Friend send me to the sign-up page, so I guess I’m out of luck there.

I see a lot of basic information about the users with enhanced profiles, like their bra and cock size, religion, hair color and whether they like to smoke crack or shoot heroin.

If you’re using TSdates as a legit place to meet people, and you’re going the free route, there is technically enough here to help you meet some trannies you might be interested in. It’s really obvious from a free account that you’re missing out on a ton of features, and they take every opportunity to point this out and try to get your 40 bucks a month.

Beat Off to Live Tranny Cams

TSdates also has a ton of tranny WebCam shows going on any time. As I write this, there are nearly 400 members broadcasting right now. My home screen offers up a couple confirmed shows, one featuring a blonde with red lipstick and presumably a huge cock, while the other is a thicker, more exotic shemale slut.

It’s a pretty fucking big selection, much larger than the tranny section of a lot of WebCam sites. I could see a lot of perverts tuning in for the shows without bothering to fill out their TSdates profile. I wonder how many of these users contribute to that giant number they show out front.

However it breaks down, TSdates.com is a very active site full of real trannies and their fans. You can use it like a Shemale version of Facebook, or if you’re the more adventurous type it can definitely help you bone some genuine ladyboys. There’s a big WebCam area, too, which means there are plenty of live lady dicks to see even if you don’t want to leave the house or interact.